Breaking up

by Karen France
(London)

I am writing this as I feel it may be therapeutic. When you are involved with a married man you don't really have anyone non-judgemental to talk to.
I have been involved with a married man now for 18 months. I met him on-line and didn't realise he was married. Even when I did find out I stupidly decided to carry on. His wife is disabled. There are no sites or discussion forums that
relate to this so it is difficult. In many ways I feel sorry for him. But he seems to have a relatively normal life, going on holidays and things. Which I resent as I would like to go away on occasions with someone other than a friend.I rarely see him. He said he loved me, in fact I am sure he did. He never at any time said he would leave his wife and I never asked him. But I have spent the last year trying to get out of it. He has made it very difficult for me as he won't accept it.

He is a lovely person, but I still feel very secondary in his life. I hate being a secret. I am not stupid. He is using me. However I decided to finish it and 3 weeks down the line I am still hurting. We do not contact one another now, which is my decision as it is the only way out. But I cannot get over him. Most sites deal with men with families etc. And say all married men are liars. What I need is someone telling me that even though his wife is disabled, he was a liar too.